Thursday, April 10, 2008

SCHOOL'S OUT!!!

Here it is! My first post...

Now that I've finished out the semester, I actually have time to post something! And, as school has been my life for the past little while, I thought I could share one of my finals. (Aren't you all excited now?!) I took a Principles of Parenting 1 credit block class, which means it was only 6 weeks long, but I enjoyed it very much, and the principles are definitely share-able!
Our assignment was to choose 20 principles of parenting, and write "justifications" as to why they are key principles, along with catchy phrases or names for them. I chose to follow a theme - Parenting SPECTRUM - and so the principles are not clearly laid out in some of them. It may take detective work to find them! Enjoy! :o)

The Parenting SPECTRUM – 20 KEY Principles
A Place for Every Parent, and Every Parent in Their Place!

By: Kayleen Hardy (24yrs, mother of none (yet), aunt of 33)
(note: not necessarily in order of importance…)

BLACK-en those shoes!
Shoes are some of the most important accessories we can buy, since they are for the feet! They provide a cushion and a covering as we rush around, fast and slow, fulfilling our important duties as parents. If they are not kept in good repair, or if we try to continually wear shoes that do not fit us, they can be ineffective in their normal functioning, and provide a source of sore feet! In parenting, it is important to keep our own “shoes” in good repair – our mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual strength, even all of our earthly needs, so we are not worn down and full of holes.

Service – ORANGE ya coming?!
Oranges provide a unique eating experience – they are nutritive, juicy, and consist of several sections, which can be eaten separately and savored one by one, and most importantly – shared! This is how I see the use of service in parenting. Before partaking of the fruit, there is a level of uncovering that needs to occur – the bitter, selfish peel must be removed, and convincing descriptions of the fruit anticipated, or else it can be passed off as undesirable, or hastily thought not worth waiting and working for. However, when parents enthusiastically invite their children to help in the unpeeling process, and allow them to partake in the sharing and receiving – the flavor is unmistakable!

IRIDESCENCE
Iridescence found anywhere is fascinating, but I like birds the best! Birds of a feather like to flock to together, but what about the ones whose colors are always changing? Where do those kinds of feathers belong? It’s so important to always include our children somewhere in the realms of our human understanding, no matter how often their colors are changing on us! It also helps to refrain from pecking and preening them in an attempt to control or find out why their colors change, and simply be satisfied in remembering that, although long forgotten, our own feathers are certainly iridescent too!

GREY-t big, big, whale of a Tale!
Did you ever laugh so hard that your teeth fell out! Grandpa’s did! And then because they fell out he laughed all the harder! That one is being handed down in the family annuls! Sometimes, when life makes us feel as though we’re being swallowed by a whale, those times are potentially the best makings of a good tale! In ANY situation, whether good or bad, the things that are worth remembering almost always make us laugh. When the huge whales approach, don’t be deceived by the size…they are only as big as YOU make them!

SILVER linings
Did you ever hear that “every cloud is lined with silver?” Well, that’s true, but you only see silver if you’re looking at the clouds! The difference is not necessarily in the clouds, but in those that are looking! In parenting, both children and parents must look with clear VISION at the clouds above them, in order to turn the weather forecast from “foreboding” to “forewarning.” It is because they must know what it is that they attempting to accomplish, and with what conditions they have been given to accomplish it, that they look at the clouds. With this kind of vision it’s a lot easier to prepare to recognize the silver when it falls from among the clouds.

Keeping the whites WHITE!
Thank goodness for bleach! Once tough stains have appeared, it takes effort to make them disappear again. Sometimes they are always there, and we have to continually use the best soap and scrub and scrub and scrub before they grow lighter and lighter, and sometimes, no matter what we do, they don’t go away. Words are the same – once we say them, they’re said! Whether our words stain or not makes a big difference for ourselves and our children! Keeping the whites WHITE means putting those words through the washer before they come out of our mouths, so we won’t be scrubbing afterwards. We’ve got to watch those washers – sometimes they get grimy too, and they have a direct affect on the next batch of WHITES!

GLOW IN THE DARK
What parenting spectrum would be complete without colors that GLOW in the dark?! The darkness of night would seem so much darker, without those starry shapes and spots of light on the ceiling! But where does the light come from? Is light really there, trapped inside? No, it is not the source of the light, but after long exposure to a REAL light source, it has the ability to relay that light, and even chase away dark. Probably the most important thing that parents can do is become a GLOW IN THE DARK! Having discovered that God is the source of the REAL light, and being continually exposed to that light, they can glow through the darkness of our children’s lives, and help them find their way to the switch that only they can turn on – a choice to partake of the REAL light in their lives!

PRISMS
According to dictionary.com, a PRISM is: “ -noun, 1. a transparent solid body, often having triangular bases, used for dispersing light into a spectrum or for reflecting rays of light.” From an unpublished Parent’s dictionary: Love is: “-noun, -verb, 1. a PRISM filled with time!” It IS transparent; nothing is hidden or held back from view because it is a pure love. It IS a solid body, when composed of triangular bases, which are sturdy, and which represent consistency of time spent, time and time again, in order to arrange the structure through which all the other colors can be seen! And, it IS for reflecting, not only our own feelings as parents, but those of generations going before, and generations yet to come, not the least of which is God our Father Himself!

“Be a True BLUE through and through!”
There is nothing like a deep expanse of BLUE – the ocean, the sky, a loved one’s eye! They run deep, and their virtues are constant amidst change; dependable, secure… as a Christian character ought to be! Christian virtues are indispensible to parents if they believe in them themselves. Compassion, love, honesty, hard work - to name a few. The examples are plentiful, the stories rich – the sky’s the limit!

PLAID – the organized array
Our lives are woven together with different yarns, consisting of the everyday choices we make. Will it be green or red, running this way or that way, and how wide do I want this piece? When we provide choices in even the simplest things, we encourage a careful, inspected handiwork that will come out more colorful, creative, and functional.

Before you bellow, swallow that YELL-OW!
Nobody needs to be told when a train is coming – its bellow gives it away! It IS nice to know when a train is near, so as to stay clear of danger, however, I am sure glad that trains don’t bellow ALL the way down the tracks! The noise is supposed to be the exception, not the rule. And so, we should temper our bellow! Many, many rules, constantly roaring in children’s ears, may only deafen them, while fewer, well-placed rules, clearly understood, can save their lives!

Wipe the BROW-N ow keep moving!
The road’s ahead, the pace is set, the time is short, rewards are waiting - the race is on! Contestants – only four – it’s YOU two, hand-in-hand against YOURSELVES! Parents clearly set the pace! In their relationship together, their sociality, attitudes, values – their EXAMPLE, in good stride, will go farther than just the end of their own race. They’ll be over the finish line cheering on those who watched them, and learned from them how to run even faster!

GREEN, green, the learning machine!
Living things, unlike man-made machines, are constantly growing! They develop a piece at a time, a little here, a little there, and their potential is either fostered or hindered by the environment in which they are nurtured. Sun may provide reaching opportunities, new discoveries, buds and branches. Rain might pelt hard, challenge knowledge and break branches or petals, but concentrating on the ground roots will cause even greater growth. Snow will even occasionally fall…and without understanding we may be completely covered and lie dormant, scarcely a chance to see at all, until the Sun uncovers the true purposes. Learning is for all seasons!

Tickled PINK by the littlest wink!
Sometimes the littlest things make such a big, big difference! While they themselves have little value, something as simple as a hug, a song, a wink or a word, may be all it takes to fill up a child’s cup, labeled “JOY.” Joy within, joy recognized, joy received, joy shared, joy needed! Parents also have a cup, and the way to keep it filled, ironically, is to constantly tip it and generously POUR into their child’s! Live joyfully!

RED-dy, Set, Go!
Street lights – simple, right? Red is for STOP, Yellow for YIELD, Green for GO. When it comes to governing ourselves as parents, we may be wrecked if we are constantly switching our toleration levels quickly between STOP and GO, rarely thinking at all about YIELD! Fortunately, there is a better option! It is bright, flashing RED! While the intersections where our opinions cross may look clear, there is a good reason to STOP, and then proceed with caution! Patience, more than a virtue, will prevent bang-ups, fines, and rehabilitation costs!


Royal PURPLE Hardy Circle
A feeling of belonging is royal! Whether we be of a Hardy, Jones, Smith or any other circle, and that circle is PURPLE or any other color, it pays to invest in those crown-jewels of unity, and establish traditions that are righteous and lasting! The king and queen hold the scepters of power, and should help their subjects feel a part of that power, until they depart with a portion to establish their own sovereignty. That’s the beauty of a circle – it widens to include new ground and doesn’t need a new shape!

TAN your hide!
But please make sure that the animal is dead first! Emotions are like a rampaging animal – the leather would be really useful, but you can’t make leather until the arrow is flown and there is no more chance of being made leather of! The animals of emotion must be recognized for what they are, roped in, tamed and trained and brought into wise subjection. More than just patience, it takes practice and skill to respond to emotions promptly, effectively, and with respect, before honing in on a child’s behavior. The key is: don’t jump the gun!

“I don’t know…just TEAL me!!”
Honestly, just being told truths will never result in really knowing them! Teals are fresh-water ducks that dabble in ponds and marshes, feeding off the surface of the water. They show off their bright colors as if to say, “We KNOW where the good food is to be found…no need to go clear to the bottom!” However, they only know what they know! They have never tried to see if there are richer feeding grounds at the bottom of the lake! If we want our children to really learn, we need to teach them what we really know! Most importantly, we can teach that it’s OK to dig deep, and better to know truths for yourself then to go off the babblings of others!

AQUA-rd silences…
Standing on the banks of a calm lake or stream is an invigorating experience with silence! However, standing on the banks of a calm lake in silence with a child to whom you have nothing to say, because you don’t really know him, and he doesn’t know you, is probably quite awkward! Experiences cannot just be handed out to children as if they should know what to do with them – they are meant to be interactive, and to create connectedness. Effective involvement in a children’s life is manifest in the kindnesses of commitment and effort, which, like water, don’t need to be loud in order to be heard!

Go for the GOLD!
Gold, unlike most other medals, is soft! It can be molded and formed so as to perform a particular function, such as plating - used to decorate and embellish. As parents, we try to mould little hearts, and instead of deciding ourselves what the use will be, we ought to use the very best tools that we have to uncover what is already there! Perhaps if we have been successful, we will find that in the process, our hearts, too, have been molded by our own Father’s hands!

2 comments:

It's the Hardy's said...

Wow Kayleen, that is lots to read and lots to think about. Good job in your school sucess. We hope that you have a great summer. I am super excited that you started a blog. I hope that we can keep updated as to your activities by it. Have a great day !!!! We love you.
Kim

Linda said...

What a beautiful "spectrum" to read about on a Sunday afternoon. It helped me pause, and reflect on many things. Thanks for posting that, Kayleen. I loved it. You are such a neat person.
Love, Linda T.